Received two letters in one envelope, recklessly addressed only to "Mamaceta":
#3
Timmy: !Hola Mamaceta¡
Home has: | Parris Island has: |
1) Family | 1) Drill Instructors |
2) Home-Cooked Thanksgiving Meal | 2) Dehydrated, Reprocessed, Cafeteria Thanksgiving Meal |
3) Laughter, Smiles, Wine | 3) Blood, Sweat, Tears |
Really, the only thing Parris Island has going for it is the whole "they gave me an assault rifle" thing.
Today is Thanksgiving, Mama, and it is the first one I have spent without my Mama and the cats [editor's note: this is not actually true, since we had a full childhood of post-divorce holiday visitation scheduling, but I think he is experiencing some Boot Camp delirium in more ways than one].
All the depressing "I miss you"s aside, Boot Camp is going pretty well. We have graduated from Phase 1 to Phase 2, meaning we're starting to move past all the c**p and on to the Cool Stuff. Last week, we did the Rappel Wall, which was awesome, 75 feet straight down [oh god not my baby].
We also "learned" how to use our gas masks, meaning we got shoved into a room full of CS tear gas and had to figure out how to use the mask real fast. It was so cool. However, I would advise you to stay away from riots and drill instructors in possession of said gas.
Yesterday, we hiked out to the rifle range. We are learning to shoot our rifles. I am so pumped. So far we have only done virtual firing, but if the simulation is correct, I am a crack shot.
Forty-three days and two major holidays away from graduation. Miss you, Mama, let me know the news from the homefront.
#4
Hello again, Mamaceta. It is December now and bitterly cold here in Parris Island. We got issued our Cold Weather Gear. I expected high-tech military grade thermal jackets. What we got was a skullcap and one glove. Not a pair of gloves, just one glove. Motivated.
We finished Rifle Range and hiked back to Squadbays. I barely qualified at Rifle Range. You might wonder why, since I said that I was a crack shot. I'm going to explain what happened in a crude diagram:
Notice the strikingly handsome stick figure firing at target #3. This is me. Notice that he is on crutches. This is me on crutches.
I had a bout of cellulitis, a form of flesh-eating bacteria [panicky shrieks from Mamaceta], in my foot. I was on crutches for a week; fortunately, I still managed to qualify.
[editor's note once done keening: Don't the crutches look just like Tiny Tim's?]
We did Swim Survival. I am 2nd Class Swim Qualified, which is the highest available and only a dozen kids out of 300 got it.
Looking forward to cooking Thanksgiving Part Deux with you in January. Love your son Timmy